Dear Dr. Pepper,
I am a happy, energetic, hard-working 60+ year old. The men I know, in contrast, might as well be auditioning for Grumpier Old Men. Am I ever going to find a fun guy? I am very discouraged.
Sign me,
Ann Margaret Not Looking for Walter Matthau
Dear Ann Margaret,
How lucky you are to be vivacious and available! Sadly, the statistics are quite discouraging. The Odds of Find Love After 60 according to a study from the University of Bath in the U.K. are 1 in 562. That is the odds IF you leave it to fate. And I take it you are not the whimpering woman to wait on fate.
The odds are much better for those who take meeting someone as seriously as a job search. Just like jobs don’t seek people sitting on their couch, mates do not either. And as for the meeting grumpy men well, that will decrease if you meet the person who is still working, volunteering, engaged in their passions, sober for a significant amount of time, connected spiritually with something bigger than themselves. The same is for you – are you engaged in meaningful paid or unpaid work? Are you engaged in your passions – gardening, a sport, art, genealogy, cooking, swing dancing, etc? Are you practicing moderation or abstinence or is this a struggle? Are you comfortable with the big questions of life – why am I here? Where did my loved one go after death? Why is there suffering?
The key to leaving Walter Matthau grumbling and finding the well-adjusted man, is to be well adjusted yourself. Seek your enjoyment of life without waiting for a partner. Just like job hunting, what is on your personal life resume? Add all things that bring you pleasure and contribute to a better society. This type of resume attracts similar minded people.
Be your best self and keep enjoying life! I bet you will attract the right person at the right time!
Dr. Pepper